A blog named BETTY

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

I am my own imaginary friend

I'm a little freaked out today, because I keep noticing that I'M TALKING TO MYSELF. Maybe it's because hubby is out of town, so I don't use up my quota for adult words during the day. (He usually works from home, so I run into him frequently. No, that's not as sexy as it sounds.) Maybe it's because I saw the Law and Order episode last night where the lady has multiple personalities, and I started wondering if she was less lonely than other people. (She was faking it, BTW, so she's just like the rest of us--normal crazy.)

I was piddling around the house this morning, and all the sudden, I realized that I'd just said "Well, you and I both know that's not gonna happen." WHAT??? Scary. Well, at least I have the comfort of knowing that a minimum of 2 of my personalities are in agreement with each other. It's so nice when we can all just get along.

To be fair to myself (all of the myselfses), I'm not a total snob. I do talk to other people during the day...like the bonehead drivers around the mall. I tossed quite a few "What are you thinking?"'s and "Don't even try it, Bub"'s their way today. And that's when I realized that I need to talk to a real person--someone like BETTY. Thanks Betty, you're always there to save me from myself....and myself...and...myself...

Sunday, September 16, 2007

One Less to Brush....Finally!

My baby finally lost her first tooth!! You'd think she'd won the Nobel Prize with how excited we all are!At the end of 1st grade, Shnookie 4 was the only one who hadn't lost at least one tooth--most had lost at least 2 teeth, in fact. I was actually very impressed with how well she handled this distinction, since such MAJOR FLAWS tend to weigh heavily on kids. Maybe it's all the practice of always being the (barely) second smallest in the class. And she's such a perfectionist, you'd think it'd unravel her tender 7-yr-old psyche. Could it be possible that this child is already comfortable in her own skin? Wow. That'd be cool. I wanna be like her when I grow up.

So last week, she comes running to me "My tooth is loose, my tooth is loose!!" And then she leaves it there until it's dangling by a thread and driving us all crazy with anticipation. I kept walking into rooms finding her cornered by Shnookie 2, who was trying to convince her (read: threatening her) to let someone just pull it already! (Which is hilarious, considering Shnookie 2 was EXACTly the same way, maybe worse.) She let it hang there so long that it actually popped out while she was brushing her teeth. She didn't even notice until she saw it go doooooooowwwn the drain.

Then we were faced with the whole "I can't put my tooth under my pillow, so how will the Tooth Fairy know to give me money?" thing. Luckily, I was born prepared to answer to the big questions. "Write her a note, explaining what happened. It'll be fine."

Then the 3 older Shnookies decide to be REALLY HELPFUL and tell her that, since she had to wait so long to lose her first tooth, the fairy will definitely give her LOTS of money for this one...probably 5 dollars! This is the most fiscally-minded 7-yr-old girl you'll ever meet, so she's VERY EXCITED. yea.

Later, when the Tooth Fairy grudgingly puts $3.00 under Shnookie's pillow, she finds the cutest note ever written:

I lost my tooth
in the sink
I hope you under
stand.

Made my night, I tell ya!

Monday, September 10, 2007

BTW

(生きているとどまること is Japanese for Stayin' Alive)

生きているとどまること

Shnookie 2 and I were invited by our neighbors (a mom and daughter) to the NuSkin award ceremonies Saturday night. No, they do not sell NuSkin and were trying to lure us into their web. Their friend is the event planner for NuSkin, so she gives them free tickets every year. This is cool because they feature great entertainers, and this year it was Robin Gibb. So we donned our spandex disco jumpsuits (selecting just one from our vast collection was the hardest part), and off we went!

Also noteworthy here is that I finally got to eat at California Pizza Kitchen, which proves that I am really hot stuff now. It's all the way at the Gateway--downtown Salt Lake City--which might as well be two states away for how often we get there. As we came out of the underground parking structure, I remarked that it was the kind of weather that made an outdoor mall in Utah almost actually make sense. Seriously, for a state who specializes in extremes in seasonal weather, what were we thinking? You're either trudging through a foot of snow at that 'mall,' or you're rushing from store to store trying to avoid the deathrays of the 100+ degree sun. For about a week in Fall and 3 days in Spring, though, it's quite pleasant. Genius. And I was lucky enough to be there during one of those windows. Yummy!

Our goal in heading for the concert was to miss the actual awards ceremony and get there just as Robin was bursting onto stage. We were about an hour too early for that. I don't know what rock my head has been under, but whilst there, NuSkin has turned completely Asian. All that Shnookie 2 really knew was that we were going to see one of the BeeGees, so she was even less prepared than I for this turn of events. About 15 minutes after being seated, she turned to me and said "What is this? The Japanese Emmy's?" That's actually the best description I can think of, so let's leave it at that. Many beautiful, well-dressed Asian people accepting awards and walking down the catwalk....cameras flashing...confetti falling...rock music blaring. Very surreal. And neverending.

Eventually, however, Robin Gibb did burst onto the scene, and we had a blast! Neighbor Mom and I broke out our disco moves, whilst Neighbor Girl and Shnookie 2 just moved....as far away as possible from us. Actually, we all really got into it and had ourselves a good ole rompin girls night out. Very cleansing and soul-fortifying.

And while I was storing up energy all week for that little outing, I got some more scrapbooking done! May I present exhibit A, which is a layout I worked on with the help of my niece, Stephanie, and my niece-in-law, Tiffany, at our recent family reunion. They made the mistake of agreeing to listen to my pitch about DIGITAL scrapbooking, and now they have fallen under my mesmerizing spell. Few can resist. I'm sure they're churning out digital creations night and day now. Isn't this picture the cutest? It's my youngest two with a group of their cousins, and while I snapped the pic, it was my niece, Alaina, who did all the real work of getting them in this position! (Not that that stops me from taking all the credit for an awesome shot, mind you!)

Just to clarify...when I say these kids are my girl's cousins, they're really their second cousins twice removed or some-such. (a.k. My nieces and nephews' kids) I just couldn't get "Second Cousins Twice Removed or Some-Such" to fit in the title space. Not that I didn't try. I'm no quiter.

Exhibit 2 is a layout using some photos from July, when I took the girls to the Sweet and Sassy salon. In order to get my $500 worth from the makeover (slight exaggeration), I took them immediately to the park and did a photo shoot. I like to keep these kinds of photo on hand to show people that we do own combs. (I know, technically these prove nothing, since nary a one of our own combs were involved, but let's not split hairs. BWAHAHAHAHA)

Journaling: While taking some pictures of the girls at the park, I decided to distract them by asking them about boys. They had some very strong opinions! Before snapping each shot, I’d ask them if a certain boy was cute. I don’t remember their exact responses, but I believe their expressions say plenty!

Wednesday, September 5, 2007

Yes, she CAN scrapbook!

To be a true scrapbooking blogger, I guess I need to show off my latest creations. Lately, they've been few and far between, thanks to back-to-school madness (really, must they pack ALL the fund-raisers, field trips and mixers into the first week of school???). So let's enjoy, since who knows when the next layout will surface?!

This is a page about this year's ward campout. It's such a highlight in the girls' lifes, and I love reviewing the pics over and over. It's called 6 Signs of Successful Camping, and the tags say: Major morning bed-head; Flattened tent; He-Man wrestling; Hauling out the gear; Traces of s’mores on your face; Extinguished fire.

Tuesday, September 4, 2007

The Chad Who Dangles No More

(Yet another blog entry about health, BUT NOT ABOUT MINE this time! It's about Hubby's medical care, and I share this with permission. Which I probably received only because he knows that no one reads this--not even him.)

For several years, Hubby has had a little hanging piece of extra skin--a skinny blob, shall we say--on the underside of his arm, near the armpit. One day, he arbitrarily decided to start calling it his "Dangling Chad." The name stuck. And, due to his fondness for parading Chad around and sticking it in squealing children's (our own....as far as I know ~cringe~) faces, the kids became very familiar with it.

Some day, at least one of our kids will be history class, studying the 2004 presidential race, and the teacher will ask "Does anyone know what a "Dangling Chad" is?" Can you picture it like I do? My sweet child raising his/her hand excitedly and offering up the details of my husband's skin mutations? That's gonna hurt the psyche. And, since we're on the subject, THAT'S NOT ALL. He's setting them up for humiliation on oh so many fronts. Like when he wants the dishwasher started and bellows "Fire up the BARBIE!!" Or--the one that has already affected every single one of the poor little people--how he uses his middle finger to point at things. (His pointer finger nail was mangled in high school, so he trained himself to not put it out where people would see it.) All four of them somehow learned this habit as toddlers (does NO ONE pay attention to me? Hello!) and each of them has come home scorned from it when they hit school.

So....back to Chad....
A couple of months ago, Hubby decides to spruce himself up a bit. One of the targets of this mini-makover? Yup...Chad. Ten seconds in the doctor's office and Chad is no more. While most of the kids are barely stirred by this event, Shnookie 2 takes it especially hard. Well, not really, but she and Hubby had quite a few giggles over her 'bereavement.' After all, she was the one who spent the most time with Chad dangling in her face, since her dad liked to try to trick her into "gnawing it off" for him. (TMI???) I guess she'd bonded--maybe some sort of Stolkholm syndrome?? Anyhow, she was somewhat mullified when we assured her that Chad has gone to a much better place. She just wishes she could've kept his remains.